


The Life and Times of a Tiny Alchemist

by Glacecakes



Series: Alchemy Lullaby (Dadgene baby Varian AU) [2]
Category: Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure (Cartoon)
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe, Baby Varian (Disney), Dadgene, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Found Family, Gen, Moon Powers Varian (Disney), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Varian Needs a Hug (Disney), mompunzel, multiple oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-14 04:48:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28664991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glacecakes/pseuds/Glacecakes
Summary: A series of oneshots set in the universe of Alchemy Lullaby (or, Dadgene and baby Varian). Eugene, Rapunzel, and Varian's life as a family, and the people who helped make it happen.Current: With the moonstone destroyed, a kingdom has been saved! Its inhabitants have come to thank Corona. Turns out Eugene is related to them. Set post AL.
Relationships: Eugene Fitzherbert | Flynn Rider & Varian, Eugene Fitzherbert | Flynn Rider/Rapunzel, Hugo & Varian (Disney: Varian and the Seven Kingdoms), Quirin & Varian (Disney), Rapunzel & Varian (Disney)
Series: Alchemy Lullaby (Dadgene baby Varian AU) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2100729
Comments: 38
Kudos: 83





	1. Little Trio

**Author's Note:**

> I return! With more baby! There's never enough, all praise be unto him  
> I have no idea how long this series is gonna be, tbh, the 5 is just a placeholder. I may post 20, I may only do 3. Who knows! Not me! I do have a lot of ideas though, lol.  
> Reading AL is highly recommended, but you don't have to if you don't want to. TLDR Eugene adopts Varian, Ulla was a jerk and she's dead now. Hooray! Some of these will be cowritten by the lovely Finnoky who I love very much uwu
> 
> Ben is owned by Finnoky and AJIllustrated :) he's Quirin's adopted son and he is a mini menace. I love him.

Quirin fidgeted awkwardly from where he stood across from to Eugene. It was weird to be back in the palace after… everything. Varian was still afraid of him, and he didn’t blame him at all. Neither did he blame Eugene giving him a distrusting look. But he wasn’t the main focus here. No. The focus was on a small figure currently staring Varian down.

If Varian was small for his age, Ben was even smaller. Though to be fair, Ben was younger; Varian had just turned five, if he remembered correctly, while Ben was still four. His curly black hair and cool brown skin stood out against the others of Dark Kingdom descent, but to Quirin, he was going to fit right in just fine. After all, both he and Varian had a common background. 

Following the… incident in Old Corona, Quirin had taken permanent residence. It felt weird to live in what remained of Ulla’s old house, but the farm life suited him better than he’d thought. Almost as if it was what he should’ve done. Well, no use thinking of the past, he told himself. Only looking forward from here on out. Perhaps that’s what drew him to the Corona orphanage. 

Varian wasn’t his son, not anymore, he’d accepted that. But now that he had the idea of fatherhood in his mind, he couldn’t let it go. He _wanted_ to raise a child, wanted to be a father. So he’d trekked down and found Ben, with his button nose and roguish charm. The fact that he was Varian’s age was merely a coincidence, but perhaps the first step to repairing relations could be for the two to meet. 

“So…” Eugene drawled, smacking his lips together. An awkward silence ensued. Honestly, what are you supposed to do in this situation? It felt a bit like Quirin had just grabbed a kid in an attempt to win Varian’s trust, but that’s not right… right? Quirin’s not that kind of guy, after all. 

Then again… Eugene didn’t see him as the type to hurt Varian, but here we are. 

“So.” Quirin hummed. Varian clung a bit closer to his dad when he spoke, fear clouding his baby blue eyes. To be fair, Ben was nervous too, his hands shaking where they were bunched into Quirin’s pants. 

“Are you going to introduce us?” Eugene raised a brow, and Quirin startled.

“Oh! Yes. This is Ben, he’s four years old, and he’s going to be staying with me for a while.” He smiled down at the little boy. “Ben, this is Eugene and his son, Varian. Varian’s your age!” 

Ben pouted, eyes narrowing in on Varian. Who was this kid? What made him so special that New Dad wanted them to meet? “Hi,” He mumbled, and Varian waved back shyly. 

“Why don’t you two go play, hm?” Quirin’s eyes are warm, perhaps a bit overeager. “I’m sure you’ll get along.”

“I mean maybe,” Eugene muttered, but nonetheless pushed Varian forward gently. “Why not show Ben around the castle, hm? I need to talk to Quirin.” 

Varian whimpered, squeezing his dad’s leg briefly. It was a small sign, a plea for him not to go. But he still let go, toddling over to Ben. The two shared eye contact, before he grabbed Ben’s hand and pulled him into the pristine halls he called home, away from the man who they both might have called dad. 

“You wanna meet Ruddiger?” Varian asked, leading Ben down the hall towards his room. The kid was a few inches shorter than him, but his poofy hair was tall enough to compensate. 

“What’s Ruddiger?” Ben said. 

“My best friend!” Varian chimed, more chipper now that he was talking about something he enjoyed. “Well, outside of Hugo. But he’s different.” The younger opened his mouth to ask, but then shut it. Whatever, he didn’t really care all that much. 

The castle was massive, nearly overwhelming in stature. How it dwarfed them, nearly swallowed them! Ben’s eyes kept wandering around, from the shadows cast by windows to the ironed carpet floor. How could anyone live like this? He loved his current home, its small farm feel. But Varian seemed right at home. Of course he would be, with his neat hair, and fancy outfit, stupid nice smile and friendly demeanour-

He’s cut out of his thoughts when a striped blur bounces into Varian’s arms. It wraps around Varian’s neck, purring, and suddenly all Ben’s concerns melt away. A raccoon! He loved raccoons! 

“Can I pet him?” He whispers, starstruck. At Varian’s nod, he runs a hand through soft fur and squeals in delight. 

He changed his mind, Varian rocks. 

“So…” Varian says shyly, feet rocking back and forth. “Why did Quirin bring you here?”

“I dunno!” Ben chimed, giving Ruddiger a tummy rub. “New Dad said he wanted to show me off. Or something like that.” He shrugged. He didn’t actually pay attention to what New Dad said (he’d actually wanted Ben to make a friend). I mean, he was pretty great, in his opinion. So it was a logical assumption! 

Varian frowned. “New dad…?”

“Yea! Cuz I had a dad before, but this one is new! And the best!” 

“Really? Me too!”

“ _REALLY_!?”

Varian nodded. “My dad is new, too! Quirin was my old dad.” Well, Eugene was his first dad, then Quirin, then Eugene again, but that wasn’t important. 

Ben frowned. Quirin was Varian’s old dad? Did that mean he gave Varian up? Would he give Ben up, too? He didn’t want that! He liked New Dad! There had to be another explanation…

“Maybe he just didn’t like you.” 

Varian gasped. “He liked me a lot! He took me from daddy because he liked me so much!”

“Oh yeah? Then why’d he give you up?”

“Why’d he adopt you? To replace me?” 

Oh he did not just go there! Ben grit his teeth and glared up at the older kid, who was pouting down at him. 

Ben stood up.

And lunged. 

“To clarify, you didn’t adopt Ben to replace Varian?” 

Quirin narrowed his eyes in anger. “I’m offended you would think that at all.”

Eugene raised his hands in defense. “I’m just making sure! I’ve seen it happen! Don’t want Ben to get left behind, you know?” It had only happened a few times, but it always stuck with the kids at the orphanage. Someone would come and scoop up a kid, trying to fill a hole in their heart, only to drop them back off when they were too much work or not enough like the kid they lost. It sucked. Why not just get a dog in that situation? 

“Of course not. Varian opened my eyes to being a father, sure, but Ben is… special,” he smiled at the thought of him. “Such a silly boy.”

Eugene opened his mouth to respond when a shriek cut him off. It sounded like a young boy! Both fathers completely forgot what they were talking about and raced off in the direction it came from.

“That’s Varian!” Eugene cried, skidding to a stop in front of Varian’s room. He threw open the door, and both men gawked.

Ben had pinned Varian to the ground, hollering and hooting out war cries as he tugged on Varian’s hair. Varian screamed bloody murder and slammed his fists into Ben, grabbing at whatever skin he could find. 

“Not again, Ben,” Quirin moaned. 

-

You’d think that after that debacle, they wouldn’t put Ben and Varian together again.

You’d be wrong. 

Because about a week later, Varian had tugged on his dad’s pants and asked, “Can we go see Benny?”

Eugene had raised an eyebrow. “You mean Ben and Quirin? I thought you hated him?”

“ _No_!” Varian whined. “He’s fun. He makes me cry.” Eugene didn’t understand it at all, but he supposed if Varian wanted a relationship with his birth dad and his son, he couldn’t really deny him. So they’d started weekly playdates, alternating who travelled where.

The knight (or, well, former knight) was still getting used to his new routine. At dawn he’d get up to help the people of Old Corona, then start on his own farmwork. He started small, just tending to the crops Ulla had. Around midmorning Ben would join him, playing with the wooden sword he’d gifted the lad. It was around then, on a crisp spring morning with sweat lacing his brow and the earth warm at his feet, that he heard his son squeal in delight. 

“Varian!” Ben cried, running over, lugging his sword behind him. “Look! New Dad got me a _sword_!” With a heave he brandished it, holding it high above his head. Unfortunately, he was top heavy, and both boy and sword fell to the ground. Varian laughed, standing over his new friend. Ben pouted up at him, tears budding in his eyes. He whined, and Quirin dropped his farm tools at the sound. His feet carried him over to where he feared Ben was about to burst into tears. 

The whines abruptly stopped and Ben started to laugh, joining Varian. He reached up and pulled Varian down into the dirt alongside him, prompting more giggles. 

Eugene stood nearby and shrugged. 

“Is this normal?” Quirin asked, flabbergasted. 

“Don’t ask me, man! I’m just as lost as you.”

“I… Maybe they’re just like this?”

“Yea that’s the working theory.” Eugene let out a breathless laugh. The boys had taken to wrestling, rolling around in the earth like a tumbleweed. 

“Boys!” Quirin called, and they stopped to look up. He smiled fondly. It warmed his heart to see. Varian wasn’t his, he knew that. But that didn’t mean he didn’t care deeply. And to see both of the children getting along so well? It filled him with more joy than he’d had in years.

He motioned for them to wait a second, running inside before grabbing his prize. Good thing he’d thought to buy a second for himself. Varian’s face lit up when he reemerged with an identical wooden sword. 

The knight leaned down, digging the sword point into the ground. “Can I trust you two not to hurt each other?” He asked. Varia nodded violently. “Alright,” He almost said _son_ out of instinct, though he doubted that would go over well. He held the toy out as if he was a knight suiting up his king. In a funny way, he was. 

Varian snatched it up, running over to where Ben waited. He let out a shrill scream before jumping at him with the sword, completely ignoring what Quirin had just said. 

Ben shrieked, dodging just out of the way in time. He raised the sword high, this time leaning forward in order to fall towards Varian. Their wooden swords collided with a _donk_. 

“Surrender!” Ben yelled, a feral grin on his face.

Varian’s face was just as unhinged with glee. “Never! I will avenge… uh…” He looked over to Eugene, who had walked over to join Quirin in the peanut gallery. “Dad! Can I avenge you?”

“Sure,” Eugene responded. 

“I will avenge my daddy!” The little prince cheered. It wasn’t a graceful fight, considering how young they were. It was mostly just two wooden blocks smacking together over and over, with the occasional changing of positions. But the boys seemed to have a blast, and that was enough.

“So,” Eugene hummed. Maybe it was the castle staff rubbing off on him, maybe it was that “parent” drive for gossip. Honestly it could be either one. “How is Ben settling in?”

“See for yourself,” Quirin smiled, gesturing to where Ben was chasing Varian through the orchard. “He’s got a warrior’s spirit, that’s for sure. Lots of energy,” his face fell slightly. “He only uses it when he doesn’t think I’m looking, or when he’s outside. It’s like he’s afraid of messing up and upsetting me.” 

“Yea, orphanages are pretty strict, he’s probably just getting a feel for the new rules,” Eugene stuck his hands in his pockets. “Varian was the same.”

“Really?”

“Yea, for a few weeks he was terrified of anyone that wasn’t me or Rapunzel.” His smile turned wistful. “Or you, actually.”

Quirin sighed, a bittersweet sound. “I’m just… glad he’s happy,” he managed. Neither of them had really talked yet, about Ulla, or the moonstone, or really… anything about their situation. Perhaps someday they’d be ready. But for now, this was enough. 

-

Quirin wasn’t the only single parent in Corona. Hell, he wasn’t even the only foreigner who knew Ulla and then adopted. 

Hugo and Ben probably wouldn’t have gotten along on their own. Hugo was a know-it-all, mischievous, and used his cuteness to his advantage. Ben was stubborn, a stickler for rules, and brutally honest. If they had been left alone, someone probably would’ve gotten hurt. Whether it be one of the boys, or a bystander, that was up for debate.

But they both adored Varian, and Varian adored them. So it was pretty easy for them to form an inseparable trio. 

Both Quirin and Donella walked their boys to the castle, watching with amusement as Hugo tried to show Ben what he was reading for the week. It was cute how Hugo adored school, though he wondered how long that would last. Ben was in turn telling Hugo all about the frog he saw in the fields last night.

“It was _huuuuge_!” He insisted, racing a bit ahead. “Like the size of Ruddiger!”

“Nuh uh!” Hugo pouted. His little ponytail whipped around as he shook his head. “Frogs aren’t that big!” 

“Are too!”

“Are not!”

“Are too!”

“How big do you think a raccoon is?” Donella butt in, amused. 

Ben shrugged. “Big. Maybe like…” he holds his hands out so wide that he almost strains his shoulders. “This big?”

“But if he was that big, we couldn’t pick him up?” Hugo argued. That causes Ben to falter. For a moment his father feared a real argument, but instead Ben lights up and laughs.

“Hugo, you’re stupid! We can’t pick him up!” 

“You mean you can’t, cuz you’re a _baby_.”

Ben shrieks in offense, but still retains a smile. The conversation quiets significantly after that.

“So,” Donella said, turning to Quirin. “It appears we have a lot in common.”

Quirin groaned. If it were up to him, no one would have ever learned about his past; about Varian’s parentage, the woman who tricked him, and her inevitable downfall. But the royal family wasn’t one for secrets (well, except for Frederick). They didn’t tell the entire story, that would be ridiculous, but rather simply said that Ulla had kidnapped Varian and Quirin assisted them in stopping her. The only ones who knew the full story were those directly involved… and those who knew Ulla firsthand. “Is this about our boys, or our ex?”

She smirked. “It was fairly easy to put two and two together. Ulla is… was… _something else_.” Donella scratched at her scar, an unfortunate habit she picked up. “When we parted ways, I thought my stay in Corona would just be temporary. I’d lay low in the one place she’d never go, and then head back to the Iron Kingdom. Clearly, that didn’t happen.” Her face fell to a frown, squinting at the too bright sun and unpolluted streets. Some shopkeeper waved at them, and Donella simply rolled her eyes. The blinding palace sparkled in the sun as they approached, and part of her lamented not bringing her work goggles, as they might have provided some protection. Over half a decade later and she still wasn’t used to this place. 

“What changed?” the farmer asked.

Her eyes fell to their sons. 

“Oh.”

  
  


“Varian!” Both boys cried in unison. Varian stood in the courtyard, bouncing up and down where he stood. With a fond smile, Eugene let go of his hand, and all three slammed into one another, mouths moving a mile an hour.

“Varian I saw a frog!”

“Well I brought a book! And Mr. Finn says I’m at a 3rd grade level! Whatever that means!”

“And I saw a frog!”

“Well I saw a duck!”

“REALLY?”

“It was a goose,” Eugene corrected. “Hi Don, hi Quirin,” he waved. 

Varian giggled, dragging his best friends inside while they continued to talk. His cheeks were a bright red, Hugo was smiling so hard it had to hurt, and Ben eagerly ran circles around the older kids.

-

He and Donella left to run errands in the capital, leaving their boys in good hands. When he came back, groceries and supplies for his new home in hand, he was directed to a small living room. 

The room looked like it had been torn apart, with toys and books and games strewn about. Some were still open, others not even out of their packaging. A fire dimly flickered in the fireplace, illuminating a quiet scene in the center of the wreckage. All three boys slept on the floor, oldest to youngest. Hugo and Varian were holding hands, with the older facing the younger as he snoozed. Varian was smiling in his sleep, his ebony hair reflecting the flames. To his left Ben was passed out, one arm on top of Varian’s stomach, and one of Varian’s legs atop Ben’s. A soft burgundy blanket covered them all.

“It’s cute, right?” Eugene whispered as he approached. “I half expected them to set the place on fire.” Quirin snorted.

“You’re just in time, the first meeting about childcare reform starts soon.” The prince consort continued, motioning for him to leave the boys be.

He beamed. He may no longer be Quirin, knight of the Dark Kingdom, protector of the moonstone. Now he was Quirin, farmer, father, advisor to the royal family and newly-formed Child Protective Services. 

He liked this Quirin better. 

“So,” he said. “Lead the way.”


	2. Gothel's Good For One Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rapunzel and Varian have a much needed heart-to-heart. Set during AL.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiiii i'm back  
> I took a much needed break from baby, I was burnt out as all heck. But I'm back with more fluff! never enough fluff! I say as my other WIP is uh.... angst. I Have The Range  
> This is a v late gift to the lovely Space whom i adore with all my soul and im so sorry this is late

The sun hadn’t even begun to rise when she woke up. 

It wasn’t out of the ordinary for her to wake up this early, she’d always been a morning person. It was literally in her blood. What was unusual was the sound of her doorknob jiggling, which roused her awake. None of the maids were supposed to come in until at least 7 am, so what gives? Was it an assassin? A ghost? 

The door finally swung open, and Rapunzel relaxed. 

“Hi Varian,” she hummed at the small shadow in her doorway. No wonder for all the noise, little Varian was too young to be able to open those doors on his own. They were far too heavy, after all. A small part of her wondered what it would’ve been like to be him, to grow up in a too big castle with too big doors. 

Varian took the invitation, waddling in, trailing his blanket like a cape behind him. He jumped up onto the bed arms first. He flailed briefly before finally climbing up and sitting across from her. “Hi Punzel,” he whispered.

“Are you alright? Did something happen?”

Varian frowned, deep in thought. “Couldn’t sleep,” He finally said. “Had a bad dream, and Eugene put me back to bed, but I don’t wanna sleep no more.” Despite the darkness clouding her vision, she could hear his pout. He shuffled, sliding into bed beside her as she opened the covers. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked, and he shook his head. “Well, your dad is right, it’s too early to be up. You’ll just be tired all day.”

“Why can’t I just sleep later?”

She laughed a bit, reaching out to boop his nose. He joined in on the giggles. “Because then you won’t be able to play with me or Eugene or Cassie! Here, lay down with me.” With a huff, Varian did as told, resting his head on plush pillows and burrowing deep into the blankets. His caretaker laid down beside him, with one elbow propping her head up. With gentle strokes, she caressed his face and hummed the tune engraved into her soul. It worked on her, once upon a time, put her to bed before she knew how wrong her world was. 

She only hoped Varian’s world would never shatter like that. 

His faint snores were the only sound.

* * *

If Rapunzel could pick one moment in time to stay in forever, this moment would certainly be up there. 

Eugene escorted his girlfriend around the castle, one arm looped around hers like a distinguished gentleman. She hummed, content to rest her head on his broad chest as they walked. With each step the rumble of his heartbeat thudded in her ears, a sweeter melody than any song she’d ever heard. To think there was once a time she feared never hearing it again. He absentmindedly played with a strand of her hair, twirling it around his fingers as they walked. Varian ran around their legs, happy to zip around and let out some energy. Occasionally he’d slow down to walk alongside them, but inevitably he’d get distracted by the toy he was carrying. 

It was serene, it was peaceful, it was perfect. 

“Excuse me Daddy!” Varian chimed, skidding to a stop by their feet to avoid getting tripped over. The royal couple obliged, letting Varian pass with identical smiles. His laughter bounced off the castle’s hallway’s walls, sunlight illuminating him and his toothy grin. Kids were so full of energy, so rambunctious, but Rapunzel wouldn’t trade what she had for anything in the world. 

“Hey, blondie?” Eugene asked. She glanced up at him in silent confusion. “I was just wondering. Does it bother you that he doesn’t call you mom? I mean, to be fair, you guys are a lot closer in age, he’s what, 14? Years younger than you?” Eugene tended to ramble when nervous. It was a rare sight, to see him unsure, without his charisma and confidence. But Rapunzel couldn’t help but find his concern adorable. The fact that he was worried for her, about how she felt… it warmed her very core. 

Growing up with Gothel, she never felt like her emotions were being considered. It was always  _ her _ opinions and thoughts taking priority. No matter how Rapunzel felt, no matter what she said, mother was law. But out here, with her family, her real family? She was thought about. She was loved, she was fawned over in concern. 

“No, Eugene, it doesn’t bother me,” she smiled, bringing her hand up and placing a kiss on his cheek. He melted into her touch; she was his candle, he was her wax. “He’s closer to you than he is to me, that’s all.”

“Right, but…” Beige eyes bore into hers, questioning.

“Yes, someday I would like it. Whenever he’s ready, though.”

Speaking of her little gremlin, she felt a familiar tug at her hair. Turning to him, he was gazing up with big, pleading eyes. “Punzel, can we hammock?” Oh sun above he was just the cutest thing! “Hammock” referred to Rapunzel stretching her hair all over the room and letting Varian rest in it like a cradle. Whenever she was working on a large piece of her room he’d sit and watch from his nest of gold, eyes wide as the moon. 

“Sure sweetie!” She chimed, sweeping him up and twirling the two of them around. Shrieks of delight floated from his tiny body, thrilled at being thrown around. Eugene wasn’t as big of a fan, but he was one who preferred a more quiet existence. Less adventure, more staying put and having their happily ever after. Not that it was a bad thing! It just meant that his blood pressure tended to spike when his son and girlfriend were daredevils. “As long as Eugene is ok with it!”

“I mean, I dunno if I’m ok with my child twenty feet up in the air but, yknow, not really my call,” his voice remained light-hearted, indicating his more mocking intent. “Not like I’ve caught this bugger when he likes to jump into my arms from the rafters,” a pointed look was sent to the toddler. Rapunzel snorted; she remembered that well. Varian had been delighted to see Eugene, doing just that, and giving the man a heart attack. 

“I’ll keep a leash on him,” she joked.

* * *

Actually, that wasn’t really a joke. 

Rapunzel hummed, throwing her hair around the room as per usual, but wrapping a lock around Varian’s ankle. Not too tight as to hurt or restrain him, more like a bungee cord or safety harness. That way, if he fell, she could easily pull and catch him. He didn’t mind, happy to swing in her hair as she painted. 

“Does it hurt?” He asked casually, legs kicking as he swung higher. For a boy raised by a narcissist, he sure knew how to think about others. But then again, that’s all he knew how to do. Rapunzel would know, she always thought of Gothel before herself back then.

In all honesty, she didn’t know the whole story regarding Varian and his birth mother. She didn’t even know the woman’s name. Eugene only met her in passing, when she literally kicked Varian to the curb after months of abandonment. Varian didn’t talk about her much either, sensing that the idea made them all upset. But he didn’t understand; they weren’t upset  _ at  _ him, rather  _ for _ him. 

“Punzel?” Varian snapped her out of her thinking; in her frustration, she’d drawn Gothel. Ugh. Therapy painting was one thing, distracted doodling was another. Pascal, helpful as ever, handed her the flat color “eraser” brush. “Sorry, what was that?” 

“Does it hurt when I swing from your hair?” Varian asked, glancing over at what she was working on. “...and who’s that?”

Her hand froze, preparing to erase the witch from her wall and life… but hesitated. “No, it doesn’t hurt, unless you were to yank on it real hard,” she answered the first question almost absentmindedly, turning to see his wide blue eyes. She tugs on a far strand, shortening the swing and bringing him up to meet her. “And this,” she gestured to the painting. “Is… was… Gothel. She raised me. I’m just like you, I had a mom that... wasn’t very nice.” 

Varian tilted his head, confused. “But I thought Miss Grandma was your mom?”

“She is!” Rapunzel reassured, chuckling slightly at his name for her. Varian was a curious little lump, almost to a fault, so it was no surprise that he began to scale her hair to sit next to her. The hand that steadied his ankle rope was almost instinctual. “But Gothel…” she let out a puff of air, trying to find the words. 

Her story was a complicated one, that was for sure. No doubt future Coronans would have fun learning their history. “For a long time, I thought Gothel was my mother. She told me the outside world was a dangerous place, and people would only want to use me for my hair. Back then, my hair had special powers that could heal any injury… even aging.” Varian’s eyes widened, engrossed by the tale. He scooted closer, letting Rapunzel wrap an arm around him as the two stared at her portrait. “But the truth was that Gothel kidnapped me from my parents, locked me in a tower, and used my hair for herself.” 

Varian’s eyes were near bulging, his face went sheet white. That… that’s what Momma wanted to do to him…! To use him, and hide him from the world! He couldn’t believe that there was someone like him, someone who felt abused and hidden away. 

A small part of him despised this new Gothel woman. She had no right! Punzel didn’t belong in a dingy tower, she belonged with him and Dad! 

“...How did you escape?” He asked quietly, almost afraid of the answer. But the smile he got from Rapunzel shone like the sun, burning away any doubt.

“Your dad.”

“...really?”

She nodded, resting her cheek on his head. “Your dad took me out of my tower for the first time, and we spent my 18th birthday together. That’s when I learned the truth and left for good.” 

“Just like me…” he breathed. He rearranged himself so he could look up and give her a huge, toothy grin. “You’re just like me!” 

She giggled. “I am!” A dainty finger reached down to poke his nose, earning delighting kicks and tiny squeals. Their laughter died down, and she finally took the brush to her wall, erasing Gothel’s image, stopping her from ruining a wonderful moment. 

But… Varian bit his lip, puffing his cheeks in thought. After a few moments of waiting (he was incredibly impatient, to the point where it was kind of a problem) he blurted out, “Do you miss her?” 

The princess blinked a few times, processing his question, but he took the opportunity to ramble. “Cuz you said she raised you and she was your momma, but she wasn’t really your momma, and your real momma loves you, but you still love your old momma just as much as your new one, an-”

“Varian,” she cut him off, finishing her wall and lowering the brush. His lip wobbled as crocodile tears threatened to spill over. She hissed between her teeth, unsure how to go about this. On the one hand, she could answer truthfully, giving Varian reassurance that he wasn’t alone (because it was pretty clear his stance on his birth mother) but on the other hand… she didn’t want to encourage a positive stance on this woman. What little she does know is… not good. Like, worse than Gothel not good. 

At least that witch  _ pretended _ . 

“Yes,” she said softly, placing a gentle hand on his apple-sized cheeks. “Sometimes. It’s ok to love her and miss her, but… she’s not your real momma. She never was. A real momma loves their children unconditionally, and would do anything to keep them safe.” He doesn’t look very convinced. “Think of it this way. Yes, I sometimes miss Gothel, and back when life was so simple. But then I think about what I’d want to say to her if she was right here, and none of it is nice.” He giggled at that. “And then my mom, my real mom,” she smiled at the thought. “I can’t think of a thing I don’t like about her.” 

Varian blinked, slowly taking in what she was saying. His eyes were aglow with thoughts, so potent she could nearly see the words printed on the back of his eyelids. 

“Why don’t you try?” she offered. “What’s the one thing you’d want to say to your momma if she was here?” 

He looked down, legs swinging over the massive drop to the floor. Momma… Momma would let him fall. She’d make him fall even, to test his reactions. To see if a rock would catch him.  _ Could _ catch him. But then Rapunzel… she had him anchored to her side. She was ready to catch him should he decide to jump on his own. He would know, he’s done it before. 

“I dunno,” he finally said, shrugging. “Um… that… she wasn’t very nice,” Rapunzel nodded encouragingly. “And… and that I don’t like when she yells… or the experiments…”

“Experiments?” The woman muttered under her breath. What could possibly call for experimentation? 

“And…” he glanced up, nervous. “That uh… that I like my new momma a lot more.” His cheeks were dusted with roses, pink coloring freckles in shyness. 

She blinked once. 

Twice.

Then a smile creeped up on her face, larger than any she’d had in a while… maybe ever, unless you count her reunion with her  _ own _ mother. 

And just like that moment, when she pulls him into her arms, she finally feels complete. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next one is gonna be edmund and the brotherhood, then after that is melting point introspection!   
> assuming i don't get caught up in angst. which. yknow. i prolly will


	3. Return of the King Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the moonstone destroyed, a kingdom has been saved! Its inhabitants have come to thank Corona.
> 
> Turns out Eugene is related to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello i return and I bring.... some baby  
> mostly eugene and edmund  
> but there's some baby too 
> 
> Idk why it's so much fun to write this universe??? like baby varian is SO much fun but the adults around him... juicy juicy introspection. At this point I'm writing more for myself than anything but eh who cares! I got the popular stuff on one side and the stuff I wanna write on the other side lmao

Nobody warned him.

Nobody fucking warned him. 

Actually that was a lie. Quirin did warn them. He’d brought Ben over for a playdate and said, “By the way, I wasn’t the only one hunting the moonstone. The other three wanted to meet you all. They’ll be here tomorrow.” And Eugene had gone “Wait what?” And Quirin had gone “Ok bye!” And gotten the hell out of dodge like the smart man he was. 

But the point was that he hadn’t warned Eugene for what they were like. 

Because they were fucking insane. 

It was a calm morning when it happened, the sun warming cobbled streets. With nothing on the schedule he, Rapunzel, and Varian decided to go into town. It fascinated him, how the loves of his life were so comfortable walking on pavement without shoes, didn’t they burn in the sun? But neither seemed all that bothered, so he didn’t push it. Varian’s eyes glittered as he passed by stalls and shops, head swivelling in an attempt to take it all in; Eugene’s hand was the only thing keeping him in place. A few passerbys waved and he waved back, bucked teeth poking over his lips due to his smile. 

And then  _ they _ showed up.

It was hard to miss them, what with how they towered over men and women alike, decked out in furs and armor far too heavy for warm Corona. To the left was a woman of indeterminate age, she could be anywhere between 25 and 60 and Eugene wouldn’t argue it. Her white hair was near blinding at this time of day, only offset by blood red covering half her face. Yet it did nothing to hide mischievous eyes and an upturned lip. One could assume her to be the least threatening of the trio, save for her sword, which she had slung over her shoulders and rested her arms on. To the right was a man who looked more beast than human. His eyes bore deep into everything they lay claim to, glare colder than any winter. Black braids swished with every step, and he was followed by two binturongs with razor sharp claws, nearly as piercing as his glare. And in the center, perhaps the most terrifying of all, a mountain of a man, taller than Quirin, strode forward with his armor screaming at every step. His sunken in eyes and long brown hair painted the appearance of a haggard knight, his cloak concealing half his body. 

A sea of people parted at their feet, waves of citizens ducking out of the way and gawking, yet they paid no one a second glance. 

Varian whined, hiding his face in Eugene’s pant leg, yet keeping an eye on them as they finally stopped in front of the royal family. 

No one dared move or speak. Eugene felt frozen in place as an odd mix of terror and confusion crept through him.

Rapunzel, his brave sunshine, was the first to make a move. She stepped forward with an awkward grin. “Um, hi, hello! Welcome to Corona. Unless you’re citizens, in which case hi, welcome home?” There was no response, and her cheeks flushed. “I’m sorry,” she said, flustered. “I don’t believe I know your names.”

“I am Edmund. This is Adira and Hector.” the knight spoke. “We’re looking for Princess Rapunzel and her family.”

Almost immediately Eugene went on the defensive. He placed a hand on the back of Varian’s head, stepping forward slightly so that his son was behind him. After everything they had gone through, after the people who had hurt his family for their gifts… he wasn’t taking any chances. 

“That would be me, yes,” Rapunzel laughed awkwardly. “This is Eugene, and Varian! Is there… anything I can help you with?” 

Suddenly, the knight’s face lit up. “Oh! Wonderful! Yes! I’ve come to finally meet my son!” He turned to Eugene and waved. “Hello son!” 

…

What. 

-

The six of them moved to the castle after that, not wanting to stir up any more gossip than they already had. It was as if a switch had flipped. Gone were the terrifying knights of legend, instead replaced with the strangest people Eugene had ever met, and considering Varian’s mother that was saying a lot. 

“When Quirin sent me a letter telling me about you, I just  _ had  _ to come visit, after all I needed to thank the folks who destroyed the moonstone and saved my kingdom after 25 years of ruin!” Edmund gushed, shaking Rapunzel’s hand so violently she nearly dislocated her shoulder.

“Uh huh, right, I think we’re a little lost…?” She mumbled, still in shock. 

“Let me guess, Quirin never told you about us?” The woman, Adira, spoke up, watching the comedy unfold. “I wouldn’t put it past him. He’s not a very touchy-feely kind of guy.” 

“Yea, we know that.” Eugene bit out, still staring Edmund down as he finally stepped back. The man who claimed to be his dad. Thanks Quirin, for telling him that he knew his  _ father _ , real nice of you. His attention was drawn to Varian, who was no longer hiding, but instead staring at the third man with a strange intensity… and the man in question was backing away.

“Hey, uh, the kid doesn’t have rabies, does he?” Hector asked, stepping behind Adira just in case. 

“No he does not.” Eugene deadpanned. “Look, I-I need a full explanation. Like now.” He pointed a finger at Edmund. “How are you so sure you’re my father? And where have you been, if you really are him? And who are these two!?” 

“Right yes,” Edmund cleared his throat, adopting a somber expression. “We are the Brotherhood, and we hail from the Dark Kingdom. And so does that one,” He pointed to Varian. “And so do you.” 

“Millenia ago, a single drop of moon fell from the heavens, coalescing into a single, seductive opal. It created a protective shell of unbreakable rock, and around this shell a kingdom grew. Our kingdom.”

“The people of the Dark Kingdom devoted their lives to keeping the moonstone’s destructive powers away from the world, but only a select few were selected to protect the moonstone itself,” Adira continued. “The Brotherhood. I, Hector, and Quirin are its members. Twenty five years ago, King Edmund-”

“King!” Rapunzel squealed and grinned. “That makes Eugene a prince!”

“Yes it does!” Edmund agreed, a smile forming on his face as well. “Yes, I think we will get along wonderfully, princess!” 

Eugene’s cheeks burned red. How was his fiance more ok with this than him!? Then again, she was familiar with the whole “separated from royal parents” thing, so to her this was nothing out of the ordinary. But still! Apparently he was the prince of a kingdom he’d never heard of, and his dad was alive, and his son’s biological father served him? Or was related? Which made him and Varian… cousins? Just thinking about it made his head hurt. 

“Anyway,” Adira said, swiping at Hector when he tried to push her in front of a curious Varian. She shoved him forward, and though he tried to scramble back, Varian toddled after him until the braided man was literally backed into a corner. 

“Twenty five years ago, King Edmund tried to end the moonstone’s reign once and for all, but instead destroyed the kingdom.” Great. So his dad was a nutjob  _ and _ a kingdom destroyer. “Ever since then, no one was allowed to enter the Dark Kingdom. The Brotherhood all went their separate ways.” she gestures her head over to Hector. “He protected the path to the Dark Kingdom. I sought out the sundrop, the moonstone’s equal.” She smiled at Rapunzel. “Quirin dedicated his life to helping those affected by the rocks.”

“Which is how he met Ulla,” Eugene summarized. “Ok, that’s all well and good, but you,” He pointed at Edmund. “What does this have to do with me!?” 

Edmund’s face fell, turning to Eugene with pain in his eyes. “In the fallout, I ordered everyone to evacuate. Including my newborn son, who had just lost his mother. I stayed behind to protect the moonstone, the last line of defense. I’m sure you know how dangerous it is,” he snorted. “Or rather, was. Not a day went by where I didn’t think about you.” From his cloak he produced a crumpled piece of paper, handing over an old Flynn Rider poster. “They never got your nose right.”

His hands trembled as he clutched the poster. All this time… he’d thought he was an orphan, that he had been ignored, forgotten, abandoned… when in reality his father was always alive and perfectly capable of taking care of him, just choosing not to. He’d stayed in a skeleton of a kingdom, destroyed by the moonstone, dedicating his life to protecting it when he should’ve been protecting his  _ son.  _ He couldn’t even do that right, Varian was living proof of Edmund’s failure. 

Varian… he’d taken Varian in because he knew what it was like to live on the streets. He had taken his son in under the assumption that they were both orphans, that he could give Varian the life he deserved… the life Eugene could’ve had if his dad had just been  _ there.  _ There had been  _ nothing _ stopping him from reaching out, he’d just decided a stupid rock was more important. 

_ He was just like Ulla.  _

The paper crumpled into a ball in his grasp.

-

In all honesty, Eugene really hoped that the Brotherhood left after that. But he was sadly mistaken. 

At least everyone else seemed to enjoy the brotherhood. Rapunzel and Cassandra were thrilled to hear stories about Adira’s adventures, listening with a hint of envy. And Varian, well…

“Mister Hector!” said man turned three shades too pale at the high-pitched voice. He turned with wide eyes to see Varian bouncing on his toes. “Miss Adira said you lived in a tree? Is that true? Can I go? How did you eat? Did you know trees use  _ pot-o-syntheesis _ ? Can I pet your cats? They’re so fluffy!” Finally he took a large inhale of breath at the end of his rant. 

“They’re not cats,” Hector hissed, bristling as Varian stepped closer. If he had fur it would be standing up by now. “Listen moonstone, I don’t know what kinda game you’re playing, but I’m onto you. You’re just biding your time!” 

Varian pouted, stomping his feet. “Nuh uh! The moondrop is gone! Me and Daddy and Mommy and Auntie Cass made it go  _ boom _ .”

That only seemed to frighten Hector more. “You  _ blew up the moonstone!? _ ”

“Uh huh! Mommy’s hair went  _ bwoosh _ and then this lil stone went  _ shoosh _ and we put them together like–Wait, come back!” 

Eugene raised an eyebrow as Hector skidded around the corner and down the hallway, a smirk forming when Varian toddled after a few seconds later. “Hi dad! Bye dad!” Varian cried, not stopping for a second and instead chasing after a ferocious knight. Allegedly ferocious, at least. Honestly they were all crazy, he thought as he entered a nearby room. But none were as crazy as…

“Ah, Hello son!” 

_ Him. _

“Hi, Edmund,” he groaned. “What are you doing here?”

The king gestured to his table. A porcelain teapot produced steam, wafting through the room and shrouding it in a pleasant haze. Sugar cubes stood in a small pyramid at the center of the table, alongside a pitcher of cream. And across from him, an empty teacup. “I made tea! This will surely win him over.” Oh yea, he had a habit of talking to himself.  _ Crazy _ .

Eugene scowled. “I don’t like tea,” he lied through his teeth.

“I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.” The king responded.

“Then why are you telling me?”

“It’s a conversation starter!” With every sentence Edmund’s smile grew, while Eugene’s frown only deepened. 

“That’s a lousy conversation starter.”

Edmund laughed. “Oh is it? Why, I believe we are conversing right now.” His smile turned smug. “Checkmate.” He gestured to the chair across from him. 

Eugene groaned, but sunk into the chair nonetheless. 

For a moment, neither of them spoke, simply taking in each other’s presence. The king’s face, though partially obscured by his moustache, lit up the longer he looked at his long lost son. 

The raven, previously standing so still Eugene had thought it was a statue, screamed, and he jumped. “The  _ heck _ is that?” 

“That’s Hamuel. He was my eyes into the outside world.” Edmund winced as the bird walked off the edge of the table, hitting the ground with a  _ splat. _ “You can see why I haven’t exactly… been around.” 

_ Blatant understatement. _

“So, why are you here? Besides making everything incredibly awkward.” Eugene crossed his arms, glaring across the table. 

“Well, Quirin told me that a man with my eyes and his son destroyed the moonstone.” He chuckled. “I must say Horace, you gave me quite a fright. When the wanted posters stopped appearing I thought you’d been executed.” 

“Hang on. Whoa whoa whoa,” Eugene held up a finger, before giving his father an incredulous look. “Horace?” He laughed, twirling his hand. Surely his hearing must be going, that’s a sign of age, and this man aged him half a decade every time he spoke. “Did you just call me Horace?”

“Indeed. Horace is your given name!” Edmund grinned. “Did I… not mention that before?” 

Thank god Varian taught him patience, because Eugene was about to kill this man. 

“No, you didn’t! How is it possible my real name is  _ even worse than Eugene!”  _ He shrieked, slamming his fist on the table and rattling the porcelain. “You know what, never mind. What do you want.”

“To talk!” Edmund chimed. “To catch up. We have a quarter decade to make up for, after all.” If he noticed the way Eugene’s teeth were slowly being ground into dust, he made no comment. “So how about Varian, eh? How did you wind up with him? I wanted to speak to him at some point, but Hector seems to be enthralled with him at the moment.”

“His mother abandoned him,” Eugene deadpanned, staring down at the table. “You know, I figured as an orphan who never knew his parents I could give him a better life, that kinda thing.” 

“A noble thing indeed!” Edmund crowed, raising his glass. 

Eugene slammed his face into the table. The teacup jumped and chipped. Sorry Arianna, he didn’t really care if it got shattered in his anger.

“I must say, you’ve become a fine young man. A family man! I’m a grandfather! It’s all very exciting.” Edmund leaned over the table, looking at where Hamuel laid. “Isn’t it exciting? We can bond over parenting!” 

“What?” Eugene snapped. “No we can’t! You never parented me a day in your damn life!” 

Edmund frowned, eyes softening. “That’s not true. I sent you away around your first birthday. I spent a whole year with you!”

“Oh, whoopdie doo!” Eugene yelled, standing up and placing both palms on the table. “You took care of me as an infant. Congrats! You did the bare minimum for a year and then decided to give me up!” An angry finger pointed right at Edmund. The man’s face fell, years of isolation prevalent on his haggard expression. It was so intense Eugene stumbled.

“I… I get why you left. Why you couldn’t come get me,” he sighed, anger popping like a balloon. “The rocks were a problem here too. But… you didn’t even try.”

“But that’s why I’m here,” Edmund said, eyes pleading. “To try now.”

“I…” Eugene rubbed his shoulder. “I don’t know. Maybe it’s too late. I need some time.” His boots thudded like a war march towards the door. “Thanks for the tea.” With that, he left. 

For a moment, Edmund sat in silence. He sighed. “Well Hamuel, we’re alone again. Unless you count the Brotherhood. But I mean family wise.” 

Soft footsteps, more akin to bare feet or a young child, caught his ear, and suddenly a mop of black was peeking through the doorway. “Mister Hector?” He called, confused. “Where did you go?” 

Edmund grinned. “Or maybe not.” 

-

The next morning was the final day the Brotherhood was scheduled to stay with them. After today, they’d be returning to the Dark Kingdom with plans to start reconstruction. Good riddance, in Eugene’s personal opinion. Varian mourned that his new favorite playmate/victim was leaving, but it’s not like he’d be without. 

“Your majesties, I would highly consider–  _ ACK _ !” Nigel shrieked when the throne room’s doors opened, as Varian had bolted right for him. With his spindly legs, he was Varian’s favorite target. In a very literal sense. He wrapped his arms around the man’s legs, holding on tight as he swayed in place. It was honestly impressive how Nigel had quickly adapted. Where he once would’ve fallen and broken his nose, he was so used to Varian’s nonsense he was able to stay upright. 

“Consider what?” Rapunzel asked, ignoring how Eugene snickered at his son. “What’s going on?”

The king smiled, waving his daughter over. “Ah, hello sweetheart, Eugene, Varian.” He gestured to the table in front of them. On it sat a red, ornate chest. It was small, no bigger than a throw pillow, with gold embellishments and writings Rapunzel didn’t recognize at first glance. “We received this as a gift earlier today. It was labelled for you.”

“Me?” Rapunzel cocked her head. “Why me?” At this the king shrugged. She reached out to examine it, maybe even open it, when Nigel stopped her hand.

“Your highness, do you know what that insignia is?” He pointed to the top of the chest, on which a large symbol was carved into the wood. Eugene spared a glance, and shrugged. Varian, bless his heart, was more preoccupied with ramming his toy into Nigel’s legs. His father lifted him up off the man in one swoop, much to his complaint. The toddler pouted at losing his jungle gym, and instead satisfied himself by running the toy over the table. 

“This is the insignia of Saporia. It’s most commonly used by the Separatists of Saporia.” The advisor’s words are acidic, as if speaking their name will summon them.

Eugene raised an eyebrow. “...Who?” 

The queen sighed. She patted Varian’s head as he moved past her. “After the war between Corona and Saporia, there were a few Saporians who didn’t approve of the kingdoms merging. They felt like their identity was being erased. So, they seek to destroy Corona’s.” 

“Which makes this gift… dangerous.” The king finished. His knuckles gripped the throne so tight they were nearly white. The thought of Saporians trying to hurt his daughter aged him significantly. “We have to figure out who sent it, and why.”

Biting her lip in thought, Rapunzel hesitated. Why would they try to hurt her? Or Corona, for that matter? The war was so long ago… “Maybe someone just grabbed a random box?” 

“No, the Saporians are always sure to let you know it’s them,” judging by Frederick’s exhausted tone, he’d dealt with these specific few before. 

Varian groaned, sliding to the floor. His toy rolled out of his hands, hitting the wall before stopping. That’s what Varian felt like. He was the toy, and the wall was his family. He wanted to go run, go outside, and explore! Find Ruddiger, play in the fields! But no, he was stuck listening to the king rattle on about some weirdos who wanted to hurt Punzel. 

What was so cool about these… Saporians? He could totally fight them if he wanted. Grumbling. Varian toddled up to the table again to get a better look.

The box was pretty…

They should just open it and be done with it! There’s no way this could backfire!

He opened the lid and…!

“Cookie!” He squealed. There were about a dozen or so, soft golden with gooey chocolate chips. The smell was heavenly, especially to a young child with a massive sweet tooth. He’d only had candy on rare occasions when with momma, and those were usually gifts from other people, not from her. In contrast, Rapunzel baked constantly, and on more than one occasion had to wrestle Varian away from cookie dough. 

Case in point, his little hand reached into the box, only for Arianna to gently pull it out. 

“Sorry Varian, not this cookie,” At his whine, she simply poked his cheek. “You don’t need any more cookies in these chubby cheeks.”

“Yes I do!” He insisted, giggling at her poking and prodding. “It makes me cuter.”

“They could make you  _ deader _ ,” Nigel emphasized, slamming the lid shut. “No doubt these are poisoned or cursed. With her Highness back in Corona, and…” he gestured to Varian. “The line of succession is stable for the first time in nearly two decades. No doubt the Separatists want to disrupt that.” 

“Yes, thank you Nigel,” Frederick waved him away, an air of exhaustion surrounding him like a cloud. “We appreciate your… preparedness.”

“Pessimism,” Eugene muttered.

-

The guards took the box of cookies away for testing, something that Varian mourned until Rapunzel promised to make their own batch. Another day.

“Noooo!” He whined, stomping his feet. “Now!” Once he had his mind set on something, it was hard to get him off of it. Stubborn as a mule, this one was. 

Rapunzel winced. She’d insisted that she could watch Varian on her own, she’d done it before after all. But tantrums were still… tricky. According to Eugene’s parenting books he was fast reaching the age in which tantrums ended (thank goodness), but he still had them every once in a while. Eugene had been the one to handle them before, pretty good with handling a squirming, screaming kid, but Rapunzel… not so much. As much as she and Cassandra teased him for being weak and spoiling Varian, he was pretty good with tantrums. 

Screaming kids he could handle. Cute puppy eyes he could not. 

Very fitting that Rapunzel was the opposite. 

“Hey hey,” she tried, leaning down at brushing away the tears that were quickly forming. “It’s ok! We’ll make them tomorrow.”

“NO!” He shrieked, flailing his arms and narrowly avoiding hitting her face. He hiccuped, frustrated. He’d seen cookies, he knew they existed, but he wasn’t allowed to eat them because Nigel said so? Nigel wasn’t in charge of him! It wasn’t fair! Rapunzel was supposed to be on his side! Frustrated, he let out a small scream, grabbing onto her dress to bury his face in.

Rapunzel sighed, rubbing the little one’s back in thought. 

“Hello, princess!” Rapunzel turned to see Edmund sauntering over, a friendly smile on his face. 

“Your majesty,” she breathed. “Hello! I was just explaining to Varian why we can’t see the gift I got this morning.” 

Edmund’s face lit up. “You got a gift! How wonderful!” At her upset face, it quickly faded. “I mean, what a shame. Yes, this is terrible... I don’t think this is working,” he coughed. “I’ll have to get on their good side in order to get Horace’s trust.”

She smiled faintly. Out of anyone in the palace, she knew his pain best of all. It was hard to reunite with family after so long apart, though the circumstances were a bit different. “This little one is grumpy because he can’t have the gift.”

“It’s a cookie.” Varian mumbled. 

“Oh?” Edmund leaned down. “I don’t see why he can’t have one.”

“The guards took ‘em,” the child complained. Finally! Someone who understood.

“Well, that’s not very nice of them!” Edmund crowed. “Why do you think they took them?” At the child’s shrug, he pressed on. “Perhaps we could venture down and ask? Maybe there’s a good reason, hm?”

That… was actually not a bad idea. Rapunzel blinked in shock, watching as her son calmed down significantly at the man’s words. “I don’t see why not,” she said, scooping Varian up into her arms. 

-

It was fairly easy to get into the guards’ quarters, especially given the Captain’s bleeding heart. A quick explanation that Varian wanted to see was all that was needed, and they were presented with the forbidden snacks. 

“No poison detected,” the Captain explained as Rapunzel set Varian down. “At least, none of the common ones.” 

“Common?”

“Nightshade, cyanide, botulinum, hemlock,” he listed, ticking off his fingers. “No arsenic either, and that’s their poison of choice.” 

“So it’s safe,” Edmund grinned. “Thank goodness, all of this panic over nothing.” Varian took the invitation, standing on his tiptoes and reaching into the box. 

“...No,” the man admitted sheepishly. “Saporian separatists are known to utilize all sorts of means,” as he spoke, Varian ignored the conversation, fishing out his prize with glee. No one was paying him any attention, what would they care? “These may seem like a peace offering, your highness, but that’s exactly what they want you to think. They’re preying on your kindness.”

“But you tested it,” Edmund insisted. 

“Just because it appears safe does not mean it is. You can’t trust everything.” The captain’s eyes narrowed. 

The cookie in his hand was still warm, despite the hours it had to have been sitting. Humming with delight, Varian took a large bite. The chocolate dissolved on his tongue, coating it with sugary goodness. 

Rapunzel’s gaze bounced back and forth between the men, only to pause at the sound of chewing. “See! Safe!” Her child grinned, face covered in chocolate. 

“Varian!” She gasped. “You don’t take things without asking, you know that!”

“But you said it’s safe. See?”

Then Varian’s eyes rolled back. 

He collapsed, the half-eaten cookie rolling out of his hand and stopping on the floor. A strange blue smoke emanated from the bite. 

“Varian!? VARIAN!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe cliffhanger go brrrrrr
> 
> After part 2 im going back to my roots with just baby nonsense i swear. it's just gonna be varian and angry and cat. more babies! never enough babies. add all the babies

**Author's Note:**

> If you have requests or want to join the Varian discord where we just yell about him, hmu on tumblr @Glacecakes


End file.
